Possessing effective parent advocacy skills is not something that comes naturally to many parents of children with special needs. However, I believe learning and refining these skills is essential for the long-term success of most children with special needs. Do not be fooled into thinking that just because you live in a "good" school district that your child is getting a quality education. Based on how the current educational system works (or doesn't work) you must be an active participant in your child's education if you want them to possess the necessary skills to function in society after they graduate from high school or age out of special education at 21.
One very important advocacy skill to constantly work on developing is building positive working relationships with your child's teacher(s) and case managers. The best way to do this is to establish regular communication with your child's service providers, to show up to IEP meetings and conferences and to share your successes and failures as home. Children with special needs really need a team that works together to make steady progress.
Another very important advocacy skill is to know and understand your parental rights, also called procedural safeguards. These rights are spelled out in The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) and each state has them listed on their department of education website. The difficulty with these rights is that they are written in legal language, which is often hard to understand and interpret. I urge you to take the time to read the packet that should be given to you when you sign consent for your child to be evaluated for special education and every year, thereafter. If you do not understand any of your rights, either ask the case manager to explain it to you or go on-line to learn what it means.
Another very important advocacy skill to possess is the ability to stay calm and cool at meetings, over the phone and through e-mail communication even when you are angry or upset. Many people do not respond well to angry people, especially when it is directed at them. Take your time to gather your thoughts and get your emotions under control before addressing issues with your child's education, IEP or the IEP process. You are much more likely to get to a resolution that will benefit your child if you keep yourself rationale and calm than if you are explosive, accusing and/or disrespectful.
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